Ruralsexuals unite! Let us embrace The Ruralsexual Guide to Style.
Do we enjoy buying shoes?
Of course not. We barely enjoy wearing shoes.
What is more important than our hair?
Everything.
Do we spend time and money on our appearance?
No. It would be a waste of time and money.
Do we commit social gaffes?
Yes. But we are too dense to realize it until someone explains our mistakes later.
Are we the center of attention at cocktail parties?
We are never invited to cocktail parties but we can tolerate rum and Coke in a pinch. A pinch is defined as a place without beer.
Can we deliver the European air kiss when the situation calls for it?
We'll never know because the situation never calls for it.
Do we know how much to tip the maitre d'?
We're not positive we know who he is.
Can we be found in art houses watching films that challenge our aesthetic sensibilities?
No, but we can be found in Blockbuster renting the "Die Hard" trilogy.
Do we appreciate the difference between gel, mousse, pomade and sculpting lotion?
We don't believe there is a difference. It's all goop.
What is our idea of a miracle fabric?
Flannel.
Do we go the extra mile for good grooming?
Well, we know it must be a good idea to say "yes" if the barber asks, "Do you want me to trim those eyebrows?"
Do we wear the latest offerings from the fashion industry?
Not unless you count relaxed-fit jeans.
Count me in.
[with apologies to the CitPat for the long quote, but one never knows how long your links are going to last. Perhaps if you had a policy of having permanent links accessible via a common search engine, then one would not need to quote so extensively in order to ensure the reader is able to read all of the relevant information]
by Dann
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